The Right Thing

Two weeks ago, Kate turned three. With kindergarten over two years away, we seem to already be talking about school a lot. When you talk with parents in Baton Rouge, school is a popular topic of conversation. The public schools have struggled and while we are hopeful that our children will have the opportunity to attend public schools like we did as children, we feel a responsibility as parents to check out all of our options.

So we visited a private elementary school last week. I have to admit, I drank the Kool-Aid immediately. Pristine playgrounds, cute little science lab coats, class pets, dance classes - the opportunities for Kate to expand her horizons seemed boundless. But I'm trying to temper my enthusiasm by thinking about education in a broad sense.

How do you measure the value of becoming friends with someone whose family is very different from your own? Can you overstate the importance of the daughter of a Christian minister becoming friends with a child from a different faith background? If we send our children to private elementary school, are we making a decision that will set them on a certain course?

The only answer I have right now to all of these questions is that God created our children and he alone knows what is right for each of them. We have to seek his wisdom to make the right decision. So that is what we'll do.

But those little white lab coats were so cute.

"Will I be older tomorrow?"

"Mommy, will I be older tomorrow?"

Kate asked me this simple, innocent, yet somewhat disturbing question tonight while I was putting her to bed. I feel like every time I turn around she's older. There are so many wonderful things about her being older. It's so much fun to take her places and we can do so many fun things together. But there are also growing pains for all of us. The other day, she told me a story of a couple of little girls excluding her on the playground. I was so mad. I think the anger really comes from knowing I'm not in control. I want to follow her around and make sure everyone in the world sees the wonderful, sweet girl I know. But I realize that everyone experiences pain and hurt and she is not immune.

Will I be older tomorrow? I definitely am tonight :)

From the Bumpy Road

I've been thinking about some changes to this blog for some time. We are the "Gators from Tiger Country,"  but I didn't think that was the best identity for the blog. A few months back, I thought of this idea. I grew up on a rural road in Florida that some of my family members lovingly refer to as "the bumpy road." Sometimes, when the limestone road really needed grinding, you would hit a bump and you weren't sure what direction your car (or your bike) would take you. 

I think that's a pretty good description of our life right now. Don't get me wrong - we have a great, great life. But there are bumps. There are questions. We are juggling a lot and trying to live a life that brings glory to God. It can be hard to be transparent about the bumps. It's more fun to talk about the birthdays, anniversaries, fun trips, etc. But life is about both. 

I hope you enjoy reading about our journey. Come along for the ride!

"K-K Reesa"

Dear Kate,

Three years ago tonight, I tried to sleep but sleep wouldn't come. Nine months flew by and the day was finally upon us. What would you look like? What kind of personality would you have?

My sweet girl, you bring more joy to my life than I ever thought possible. Every morning, I look forward to seeing your smile as you peak around the covers with your crazy, curly hair. Your laugh is contagious and your generous, kind heart is so beautiful. Like me, you have a running soundtrack of music in your head.  Like your dad, you are very detail-oriented and very busy all of the time.

Katherine Theresa Lundy, or "K-K Reesa" as you say, only God knows what year 4 holds but we can't wait to see it all unfold. Mommy loves you, sweet girl!

An everyday cathedral

"The world I live in is loud and blurring and toilets plug and I get speeding tickets and the dog gets sick all over the back step and I forget everything and these six kids lean hard into me all day to teach and raise and lead and I fail hard and there are real souls that are at stake and how long do I really have to figure out how to live full of grace, full of joy – before these six beautiful children fly the coop and my mothering days fold up quiet?  How do you open the eyes to see how to take the daily, domestic, workday vortex and invert it into the dome of an everyday cathedral?"

Ann Voskamp, 1000 Gifts

I've been reading this book and it's one of the best books I've read in a very long time. It's beautiful poetry. It's so relevant to my current journey in life, striving to see beauty in and be thankful for everything in life. I can't recommend this book highly enough. 

John Parker, you are 1!

Dear John Parker,

You are one today! I can't believe how quickly this day came. There were many, many moments during those first few months when I wondered if we'd ever make it to today. As I think back on this first year of your life, I have a few special memories. Some are just for me to remember and ponder, but a few I thought others might enjoy reading:

• Our first date! Holding you moments after delivery and realizing you had red, red hair just like your dad. They sent you to the NICU for a few hours because you weren't really crying, just grunting and growling. Turns out, that's your happy sound! You still start growling happily as soon as you wake up (hard to describe, but cute to anyone who has heard him do it).
• Realizing you had jaundice straight out of the gate. Just like your big sister, you spent your first week in the tanning bed. You did just fine and we sent that bili-bed packing as soon as we could.
• Your reflux diagnosis! It sounds crazy, but that was a happy, happy day in our house. You cried at all hours for weeks leading up to that appointment. As soon as you started taking reflux medication, we realized what an amazing personality you have. It was so nice to meet you, finally! You didn't have to do the meds for too long, but we were so thankful for them when needed.
• Seeing you grow to know your big sister and love her. Just this weekend I watched you chase her around the backyard. She thinks you're pretty special too ;)
• Your baby dedication. What a special day to dedicate your life to the Lord and thank Him for the blessing of your life. Your dad and I pray that you will love Jesus above everything else in this life. 
• Your sip-and-see in Florida. What a great day! You finally got to meet your family and friends from Florida.
• Seeing you start at your preschool (bittersweet) and make friends. Everyone loves you there! You have a great friend Louis who was born the same month as you. You guys are so cute together. 
• Rocking you each night while I give you your final bottle of the day. You never stop moving all day long until those few moments when it's just me and you.

Little man, I can't think of words to tell you how special you are to me. I've learned so much this year and I've grown in so many ways right along with you. I thank God for the blessing of your life. Watching you grow brings me indescribable joy. 

Happy Birthday Sweetest Boy! 

"This night is sparkling, don't you let it go"

This night is sparkling, don't you let it go

I'm wonderstruck, blushing all the way home
I'll spend forever wondering if you knew
I was enchanted to meet you

- Taylor Swift, Enchanted

The night was dark and cold, but the stars were bright. We sat on a terrace looking at the night sky over St. Louis while you held me and we both trembled. Thinking about the possibility of forever love was overwhelming that night. Two planners tried not to plan. We tried to enjoy the now moment and not think ahead. Impossible. Each of the twinkling stars held a promise in my mind’s eye. The promise of a white dress. The promise of rings. The promise of our first place. The promise of a hand to hold. The promise of babies. The promise of a long road together. 

To my Valentine: When I sat on the terrace that beautiful night with you 12 years ago, I never imagined all the wonderful things God had in store for us. 

I love you. For always.